Do you ever stop to think about all the "what if's" in your life and what a huge difference that might have made? I remember all the plans I had graduating from high school. The perfect career all planned out... But, I never planned on getting married. I'm sure the thought crossed my mind, but it wasn't something I dreamed about. And having kids wasn't even on the radar. Funny how that changes. Funny what a change in the "what if's" can do for the direction of your life.
I could go through a whole list of "what if's" and analyze how my life could have been different than it is right now. But really, the most important "what if" is one I'm sure all moms of children with designer genes thinks about.
What if Sweet Pea hadn't been born with designer genes? What if my world hadn't been turned upside down?
I would have gone about my daily life like normal (well, as normal as life with a newborn can be =)).
I wouldn't be mentally and emotionally preparing send my baby off for open heart surgery, but I would be mentally and emotionally preparing to send my husband off on another deployment.
I wouldn't have taken the time to slow down and really cheer for every milestone reached (and yet to be reached).
I wouldn't have been introduced to all the wonderful, loving families that sport designer genes.
I wouldn't have seen the unconditional love displayed by the older kids. They never once questioned that their sister wasn't perfect.
I wouldn't have had my heart changed.
I wouldn't have thought about becoming an advocate for those who don't have a voice of their own.
I wouldn't have know what it is to see perfection and unconditional love through God's eyes and not the world's.
I could go through a whole list of "what if's" and analyze how my life could have been different than it is right now. But really, the most important "what if" is one I'm sure all moms of children with designer genes thinks about.
What if Sweet Pea hadn't been born with designer genes? What if my world hadn't been turned upside down?
I would have gone about my daily life like normal (well, as normal as life with a newborn can be =)).
I wouldn't be mentally and emotionally preparing send my baby off for open heart surgery, but I would be mentally and emotionally preparing to send my husband off on another deployment.
I wouldn't have taken the time to slow down and really cheer for every milestone reached (and yet to be reached).
I wouldn't have been introduced to all the wonderful, loving families that sport designer genes.
I wouldn't have seen the unconditional love displayed by the older kids. They never once questioned that their sister wasn't perfect.
I wouldn't have had my heart changed.
I wouldn't have thought about becoming an advocate for those who don't have a voice of their own.
I wouldn't have know what it is to see perfection and unconditional love through God's eyes and not the world's.
Love this post, Lynette. Not sure if I ever mentioned to you that we found out that Ava's issues are caused by a chromosome duplication. Some serious soul searching happened for me through this whole journey. Lots of love your way.
ReplyDeleteThinking of you guys a lot as you prep for her surgery next week. What a great thing it will be to have in her history. I like to play "what ifs" with the good things we hope for our girl too.
ReplyDeleteI love this post too. I like to play the "what if" game like this too ... it helps to really focus on the blessings that we have in the here and now.
ReplyDeleteI'm guilty of thinking about the what if's too. But deep down inside I know I'm exactly where I'm supposed to be. . .
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